Jest for Puns - It's a pun contest. If you don't like it the Exodus over there. Hosted by shillotte
Please read the Discussion Board Rules before participating in the discussion boards.

Wordplay is sadly pun-derrated. However, if you like coming up with groan-inducing quips, or have heard or seen one that you think is great just post yours on this board! Have fun


(unknown photo) Winners will be GONGED_WITH_THE_WIN! Gonged With The Win!

1. Each person will be limited to 1 pun.
2. You will have until Thursday morning to post your pun, at which point a poll will be started.
3. You will then have until Saturday evening to vote for your favourite pun.
4. The winner will get the chance to choose the next weeks topic/subject.

  • You could win one of this board's specialty tokens, or a random 21st Anniversary token as directed by this board's host. Offering flower
(unknown photo)1(unknown photo)2(unknown photo)3(unknown photo)4(unknown photo)5(unknown photo)6(unknown photo)7 (unknown photo)8


To enter, just post your entries on the board by replying to the original post. (it makes it easier to keep track of) Thank you


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(#5295102) Re: weekly contest - Beer
Posted by Lil Red on 17 Oct 2021 at 1:16PM
If a redhead homebrews
Does he make ginger ale
(#5295099) Re: weekly contest - Beer
Posted by laura lee on 17 Oct 2021 at 1:05PM
How does a table full of chilled beer look?
It looks pitcher perfect.
(#5295087) Re: weekly contest - Beer
Posted by PattyMac on 17 Oct 2021 at 12:13PM
Why can't the guy who does inventory for Lipton go out and have a beer after work?

Because he is a tea totaller.
(#5295075) Re: weekly contest - Beer
Posted by marcmandy on 17 Oct 2021 at 11:21AM
I'm beerly able to contain my excitement!
(#5295062) Re: weekly contest - Beer
Posted by Jools on 17 Oct 2021 at 10:42AM
Beauty is in the eyes of the beer-holder Beer Toast
(#5294963) Re: weekly contest - Beer
Posted by eliphont551 on 17 Oct 2021 at 5:20AM
At Oktoberfest, it’s pretty important to keep up abeer-ances.
(#5294936) Re: weekly contest - Beer
Posted by Jools on 17 Oct 2021 at 4:17AM
Many thanks everyone for your votes.
As we are in October, lets have some puns themed on Oktoberfest / Beer
(#5294923) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 17 Oct 2021 at 2:31AM
Hi all in this weeks winner is Jools so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all who took part & make the board a fun place to visi
(#5294568) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 16 Oct 2021 at 3:56AM
Hi all just a few hours to go for the voting on this weeks contest. Could your vote make all the difference? Voting closes at 9PM BST this eveninG
(#5294293) Re: weekly contest
Posted by marcmandy on 15 Oct 2021 at 10:56AM
Thanks!
(#5294174) Re: weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 15 Oct 2021 at 3:44AM
Hi yes I started putting that in a while ago because someone asked the question as to if it was American or British time & it does indeed mean British summer time although that will change in a couple of weeks
(#5294028) Re: weekly contest
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 14 Oct 2021 at 3:13PM
That makes sense but it does amount to British time, I wish they would do away with the changing of the clocks, forward or backward is old school, oh well I will at least get my hour of sleep I lostSmiling
(#5293993) Re: weekly contest
Posted by Jools on 14 Oct 2021 at 2:52PM
British Summer Time (GMT+1)
(#5293925) Re: weekly contest
Posted by marcmandy on 14 Oct 2021 at 9:16AM

makes sense. we shall see
(#5293924) Re: weekly contest
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 14 Oct 2021 at 9:10AM
I would figure since he is from England it would be Britain Standard Time, but I may be wrong
(#5293914) Re: weekly contest
Posted by marcmandy on 14 Oct 2021 at 8:33AM
BST??
(#5293912) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 14 Oct 2021 at 8:29AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on 5 entries to choose from this week so good luck to all that have entered. Any problems please message me asap. Voting closes 9PM BST Saturday
(#5292468) Re: Pun of the Week - Ghosts
Posted by PattyMac on 10 Oct 2021 at 7:38PM
What do you call a ghost chicken?
Poultry-geist!
(#5292244) Re: Pun of the Week - Ghosts
Posted by Lil Red on 10 Oct 2021 at 9:43AM
What's a ghosts favorite dessert?
Boo-berry pie. 👻
(#5292243) Re: Pun of the Week - Ghosts
Posted by volvath on 10 Oct 2021 at 9:39AM
Limbo dancing ghost
(#5292242) Re: Pun of the Week - Ghosts
Posted by laura lee on 10 Oct 2021 at 9:34AM
The dad ghost told the kid ghosts to fasten their sheet-belts.
(#5292241) Re: Pun of the Week - Ghosts
Posted by Jools on 10 Oct 2021 at 9:26AM
What is a ghost's favourite Marilyn Monroe song?

"Demons are a ghoul’s best friend."
(#5292183) Pun of the Week - Ghosts
Posted by LittleTree on 10 Oct 2021 at 7:23AM
(#5292124) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 10 Oct 2021 at 2:34AM
Hi all in what was a very close run thing this weeks winner is LittleTree so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all who took part & make the board a fun place to visit
(#5291686) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 9 Oct 2021 at 2:34AM
Hi all just a few hours to go in the voting for this weeks contest as usual a pretty close run thing. Could your vote make all the difference? voting closes tonight 9PM BST
(#5290854) our 22nd anniverary token
Posted by hoot on 7 Oct 2021 at 5:53AM
Only ONE token for the number of years on GoldToken.
Anyone who wins one will be entered in the 4 in a row tournament.
The winner of the 4 in a row tournament will get six months membership!

Private Message me the answer to this question to win

Name the 5 different tokens you can receive when playing games at GT.


Remember, if you've already won on another board, no need to answer. You can only win 1 token

good for today 10/7/21 only
(#5289342) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 4 Oct 2021 at 4:37AM
Hi all thanks for all the good wishes I had a great time on holiday. The poll is now on the board & ready to vote on as usual it will close at 9PM BST Saturday. 5 entries to choose from this week many thanks to those who have entered please PM me if any problems
(#5287270) Re: Weekly contest
Posted by PattyMac on 30 Sep 2021 at 9:03AM
Enjoy and be safe Hugging
(#5287266) Re: Weekly contest
Posted by LittleTree on 30 Sep 2021 at 8:57AM
Enjoy!!
(#5287262) Weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 30 Sep 2021 at 8:54AM
Hi all this weeks contest will have to go into next week as I am on holiday & can't seem to be able to start a poll from my phone. Apologies but all will be back to normal next week
(#5286414) Re: Pun of the Week is Weather
Posted by volvath on 27 Sep 2021 at 9:07AM
Sunny side up
(#5286411) Re: Pun of the Week is Weather
Posted by Jools on 27 Sep 2021 at 8:59AM
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist Sad
(#5286251) Re: Pun of the Week is Weather
Posted by PattyMac on 26 Sep 2021 at 6:01PM
The opposite of a cold front is a warm back.
(#5286148) Re: Pun of the Week is Weather
Posted by Jools on 26 Sep 2021 at 8:11AM
But you can decide whether to climate or not?
(Not an entry)
(#5286129) Re: Pun of the Week is Weather
Posted by eliphont551 on 26 Sep 2021 at 6:27AM
There's a basic difference between weather and climate: you can’t weather a tree, but you can definitely climate.
(#5286115) Pun of the Week is Weather
Posted by LittleTree on 26 Sep 2021 at 5:48AM

Why aren’t they allowed to teach global warming in schools anymore?

It’s quite a heated subject!
(#5286064) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 26 Sep 2021 at 2:31AM
Hi all the joint winners of this weeks contest are eliphont551 Jools & Little Tree so congratulations & a token is on its way to all of you. I choose Little Tree for choosing the subject/ topic of the upcoming weeks contest. Many thanks to all that have entered or just voted & making the club a fun place to visit
(#5285780) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 25 Sep 2021 at 5:01AM
Hi all just a few hours to go for the voting on this weeks contest & as usual a very close contest could your vote make all the difference? Voting closes at 9PM BST this evening
(#5285265) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 23 Sep 2021 at 11:11AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on 7 entries to choose from this week so good luck to all who have entered. The voting ends 9PM BST. Saturday. Any problems please PM me
(#5284255) Re: The topic for this weeks puns is...
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 20 Sep 2021 at 12:14PM
You’re riding a horse full speed, there’s a giraffe beside you, and a lion right behind you. What do you do?
Get off the carousel!
(#5283822) Re: The topic for this weeks puns is...
Posted by LittleTree on 19 Sep 2021 at 11:03AM
”What do you call a horse that’s been all around the world?

A globe-trotter”
(#5283816) Re: The topic for this weeks puns is...
Posted by HeartOnFire on 19 Sep 2021 at 10:45AM

Why do horses break-wind when they buck? Because they can't achieve full horsepower without gas.
(#5283803) Re: The topic for this weeks puns is...
Posted by Jools on 19 Sep 2021 at 8:52AM
If I don’t rein it in a bit with these terrible puns, I'm going to stirrup trouble!
(#5283752) Re: The topic for this weeks puns is...
Posted by PattyMac on 19 Sep 2021 at 6:46AM

When does a horse talk?


Whinny wants to.

(#5283742) Re: weekly contest
Posted by monkeytyper on 19 Sep 2021 at 5:58AM
and thank you too, always fun..
(#5283739) Re: The topic for this weeks puns is...
Posted by volvath on 19 Sep 2021 at 5:47AM
All the goldtoken horses are trying to win gold and platinum to extent there ratings
But they hate getting wood it sends them to the nackers yard as there ratings plumitt down
(#5283734) Re: The topic for this weeks puns is...
Posted by eliphont551 on 19 Sep 2021 at 5:41AM

My pun entry is


What did the mare say to her foal?
“It’s pasture your bedtime.”
(#5283733) The topic for this weeks puns is...
Posted by eliphont551 on 19 Sep 2021 at 5:40AM
Horses (GoldToken - Horses) Racehorse
(#5283666) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 19 Sep 2021 at 2:34AM
Hi all the joint winners of this weeks contest are eliphont551 & monkeytyper so congratulations & a token is on its way to both of you. I choose eliphont551 for making the subject/ topic of the upcoming weeks contest. Many thanks to all that have entered or just voted & making the club a fun place to visit
(#5283333) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 18 Sep 2021 at 5:08AM
Hi all just a few hours to go for the voting on this weeks contest & as usual a very close contest could your vote make all the difference? Voting closes at 9PM BST this evening
(#5282453) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 16 Sep 2021 at 3:16AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on an amazing 10 entries to choose from this week so good luck to all who have entered. The voting ends 9PM BST. Any problems please PM me
(#5281630) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by laura lee on 14 Sep 2021 at 7:23AM
Why are witches always the best cat moms and are there for them when they need them the most? Grey Cat A witch in time saves nine.
(#5281627) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by PattyMac on 14 Sep 2021 at 6:57AM
What do you call witches who live together? Broom-mates.
(#5281592) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 14 Sep 2021 at 4:30AM
Why couldn't the little witch read her spellbook? It was written in curse-ive.
(#5281275) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by HeartOnFire on 13 Sep 2021 at 7:44AM
Why is it good to drink witch's brew? It's very newt-tricious!
(#5280896) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by LittleTree on 12 Sep 2021 at 9:44AM
What problem do you encounter with twin witches?
You can never tell witch is witch.
(#5280859) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by Lil Red on 12 Sep 2021 at 7:25AM
What do witches put on their hair!
Scare spray.
(#5280858) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by rabbitoid on 12 Sep 2021 at 7:21AM
Why are witches no longer what they used to be? They all now use material made in Taiwand.
(#5280852) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by Jools on 12 Sep 2021 at 6:57AM
What happens if you break the rules at Witch School?
You get ex-spelled
(#5280849) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by monkeytyper on 12 Sep 2021 at 6:52AM
Why do witches not wear a regular hat?
Because there's no point in it.
(#5280841) Re: Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by eliphont551 on 12 Sep 2021 at 6:40AM
Why did the aspiring witch get rejected by the coven?
She couldn’t drive a stick!
(#5280835) Keeping in the upcoming Holiday of Halloween - Witches
Posted by PattyMac on 12 Sep 2021 at 6:01AM
Lets do witches, bet there are some great puns out there Thumbs up
(#5280711) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 12 Sep 2021 at 2:34AM
Hi all the winner of this weeks contest is PattyMac so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As normal you now get to choose the subject/ topic of the upcoming weeks contest. Many thanks to all that have entered or just voted & making the club a fun place to visit
(#5280079) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by jbdobie on 10 Sep 2021 at 4:25PM
And one of them is a Hershey's bar. So I think you made a good call there. (And provided some nice creative help.)
(#5280031) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by bestgremlin on 10 Sep 2021 at 12:20PM
Perhaps they are marshmallows and poptarts?

Maybe it's a case of
"S'more the merrier..."?
(#5279921) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 10 Sep 2021 at 3:31AM
Hi all in what was a bit of a change this week we have 4 entries to choose from on the poll which is on the board & ready to vote on so good luck to all who entered. I gave it an extra day this week because of the low amount of entries so the poll will now close at 9AM BST Sunday
(#5278948) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by HeartOnFire on 7 Sep 2021 at 4:54PM

French Kiss

(unknown photo)
(#5278775) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by PattyMac on 7 Sep 2021 at 8:17AM
(#5278608) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by Jools on 6 Sep 2021 at 10:43PM
Can you explain the pun here, I'm not getting it
(#5278591) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by PattyMac on 6 Sep 2021 at 8:51PM
Remember the pictures have to be approved first,
(#5278501) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by laura lee on 6 Sep 2021 at 6:04PM
{ Image: www.honeybearlane.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/s-mores-a-real-family-treat-2499.jpeg }
(#5278482) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 6 Sep 2021 at 4:53PM
I am sad that only one has entered so far with an awesome picture, I was looking forward to the pictures and I hope more will enterSmiling
(#5278133) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by shillotte on 6 Sep 2021 at 3:28AM
That is fine good idea Smiling
(#5278061) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 5 Sep 2021 at 10:51PM
You are in a costume like a dinner plate or a garden salad, that is what I mean by a pun costume, you can find people wearing such costumes on the internet, costumes that most would not wear or think of making.
(#5277921) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by eliphont551 on 5 Sep 2021 at 3:24PM

Greenhouse


(#5277863) Re: Costume Pun Picture
Posted by Jools on 5 Sep 2021 at 12:44PM
not quite sure how a picture works as a pun and no idea what a "costume pun" might be Puzzled
(#5277812) Costume Pun Picture
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 5 Sep 2021 at 9:53AM
Since halloween is around the corner I would like people to go look for a picture of your favorite costume pun and post it here, I hope that is alright with shillotteSmiling
(#5277678) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 5 Sep 2021 at 1:57AM
Hi all in a very close contest this week we have joint winners **Lover of Darkness** & HeartOnFire so congratulations to you & both & a token is on its way to you both. I now choose **Lover of Darkness** to pick the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all who have taken part
(#5277401) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 4 Sep 2021 at 5:34AM
Hi all just a few hours to go for the voting on this weeks contest & as usual a very close contest could your vote make all the difference? Voting closes at 9PM BST this evening
(#5276540) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 2 Sep 2021 at 4:38AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on 7 entries to choose from this week so good luck to all that have entered. Any problems please message me asap. Voting closes 9PM BST Saturday
(#5275198) Re: weekly contest
Posted by Jools on 30 Aug 2021 at 12:38PM
Where do you go to if you want to train to work in an ice cream parlour? Sundae school.
(#5275108) Re: weekly contest
Posted by HeartOnFire on 30 Aug 2021 at 7:26AM
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's okay now. He woke up!
(#5274921) Re: weekly contest
Posted by LittleTree on 29 Aug 2021 at 4:23PM
My wife asked if people wearing camo was big when I was in school.

Told her if they did, I didn’t see them.
(#5274917) Re: weekly contest
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 29 Aug 2021 at 4:13PM
Who’s the most dishonest member of the school faculty?
The lie-brarian, of course!
(#5274898) Re: weekly contest
Posted by eliphont551 on 29 Aug 2021 at 3:08PM
What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Spelling!
(#5274853) Re: weekly contest
Posted by PattyMac on 29 Aug 2021 at 2:06PM
Did you hear someone fainted in school

Yeah she went down in History
(#5274838) Re: weekly contest
Posted by Lil Red on 29 Aug 2021 at 12:51PM
What is s chalkboard's favorite drink

Hot Chalk-olate
(#5274743) Re: weekly contest
Posted by monkeytyper on 29 Aug 2021 at 8:00AM
thanks to all that voted and I choose the next topic to be --SCHOOL-- since it is that time of year again..
(#5274671) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 29 Aug 2021 at 2:29AM
Hi all the winner of this weeks contest is monkeytyper so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all who entered or took part by voting
(#5274158) Re: weekly contest
Posted by LittleTree on 27 Aug 2021 at 4:20PM
That was very kind of you **Lover of Darkness**! Thanks with hearts
(#5274039) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 27 Aug 2021 at 2:21PM
Hi all as some have noticed there are 2 puns that are the same there are no rules against this so I put them both in. Lover of Darkness has kindly contacted me to say that his votes can go to LittleTree as that was the first one to post. So I just ask that in future if you could check to make sure the pun you are going to post has not already been posted hopefully the situation will not arise again Lover of Darkness normally checks but on this occasion didn't & this is why it has occurred. Thanks for your understanding
(#5273898) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 27 Aug 2021 at 4:00AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on sorry it is late forgot all about it yesterday! 8 entries to choose from this week so good luck to all that have entered. Any problems please message me asap I am aware that 2 people have entered the same pun but as there is no rule against it I have put them both in. For 1 week only the contest will end on Sunday at 9AM BST
(#5273323) Re: THE TOPIC THIS WEEK IS CHINESE FOOD
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 25 Aug 2021 at 3:20PM
Chinese Food is amazing
but I do find it hard to believe that a chicken fried this rice
(#5272873) Re: THE TOPIC THIS WEEK IS CHINESE FOOD
Posted by amthevessel on 24 Aug 2021 at 3:08PM
Moulinex makes things better, and that includes the rice !
(#5272723) Re: THE TOPIC THIS WEEK IS CHINESE FOOD
Posted by monkeytyper on 24 Aug 2021 at 8:20AM
Chinese food take out: $10. Cab fare to get it: $6. Getting back home and realizing they forgot one of your containers....
Riceless.
(#5272357) Re: THE TOPIC THIS WEEK IS CHINESE FOOD
Posted by HeartOnFire on 23 Aug 2021 at 11:04AM
I found a terrific online course for cooking Chinese food.
It’s called 'Wok This Way.'
(#5272353) Re: THE TOPIC THIS WEEK IS CHINESE FOOD
Posted by LittleTree on 23 Aug 2021 at 10:49AM
Chinese Food is amazing but I do find it hard to believe that a chicken fried this rice!
(#5272338) Re: THE TOPIC THIS WEEK IS CHINESE FOOD
Posted by Jools on 23 Aug 2021 at 10:17AM
I couldn't decide what Asian food I wanted more: Japanese or Chinese, so.....
I just called it a Thai
(#5272260) Re: THE TOPIC THIS WEEK IS CHINESE FOOD
Posted by PattyMac on 23 Aug 2021 at 6:15AM
The city of Augusta has just outlawed Chinese food

That’s pretty low Maine
(#5272174) Re: THE TOPIC THIS WEEK IS CHINESE FOOD
Posted by ozallan on 23 Aug 2021 at 12:43AM
Hi folks,

What was the most popular Chinese food of the 20th Century? Mousie Tongue.

Alolan.
(#5272173) THE TOPIC THIS WEEK IS CHINESE FOOD
Posted by murrsquito on 23 Aug 2021 at 12:35AM
Thanks to all who voted for me.
The topic for the next weekly contest is:
CHINESE FOOD
(#5271861) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 22 Aug 2021 at 2:41AM
Hi all the winner of this weeks contest is { murrsquito } so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all who entered or took part by voting
(#5271461) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 21 Aug 2021 at 3:24AM
Hi all just a few hours to go for the voting on this weeks contest & as usual a very close contest could your vote make all the difference? Voting closes at 9PM BST this evening
(#5270865) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 19 Aug 2021 at 6:07AM
Hi all the poll is on the board for this weeks contest & ready to vote on. A very healthy 9 to choose from this week so good luck to all who have entered. Voting finishes at 9PM BST. Any problems please message me asap Many Thanks
(#5270346) Re: The topic this week is dogs...
Posted by murrsquito on 17 Aug 2021 at 2:47PM
It was raining cats and dogs. Just my luck, I stepped in a poodle.
(#5270120) Re: The topic this week is dogs...
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 16 Aug 2021 at 6:39PM
Why are dogs like phones?
Because they have collar IDs.
(#5269827) Re: The topic this week is dogs...
Posted by PattyMac on 15 Aug 2021 at 7:21PM
What happened to the dog who gave birth on the side of the road? She was ticketed for littering!
(#5269815) Re: The topic this week is dogs...
Posted by LittleTree on 15 Aug 2021 at 6:44PM
What is a pup’s favorite superhero? Labra-thor.
(#5269790) Re: The topic this week is dogs...
Posted by HeartOnFire on 15 Aug 2021 at 5:49PM
🎶Jeremiah was a bulldog.🎶
(#5269704) Re: The topic this week is dogs...
Posted by Jools on 15 Aug 2021 at 11:09AM
The dog catcher liked to sing while he worked picking up strays, “You ain’t nothing but a pound dog.”
(#5269646) Re: The topic this week is dogs...
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 15 Aug 2021 at 6:01AM
.
We have to throw out the mattress. We have bed-Pugs.
(#5269645) Re: The topic this week is dogs...
Posted by laura lee on 15 Aug 2021 at 5:54AM
Don’t drop snacks on the floor on game day—you don’t want to end up with a wide retriever!
(#5269643) The topic this week is dogs...
Posted by eliphont551 on 15 Aug 2021 at 5:50AM

He’s not a bad dog. He’s just a little ruff around the edges.’

(#5269642) Re: weekly contest
Posted by eliphont551 on 15 Aug 2021 at 5:49AM
Thank you. Smiling I'm going to pick Dogs for this weeks topic. Smiling
(#5269573) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 15 Aug 2021 at 1:54AM
Hi all in what was a very close run thing this weeks winner is eliphont551 so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all who took part & make the board a fun place to visit
(#5269282) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 14 Aug 2021 at 3:21AM
Hi all with just a few hours to go for voting on this weeks contest it is extremely close with a 4 way tie could your vote make all the difference? Voting closes tonight at 9PM BST
(#5268426) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 12 Aug 2021 at 7:58AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on an incredible 12 entries to choose from the most ever so good luck to all who have entered. Any problems please message me asap. Voting closes on Saturday evening 9PM BST
(#5267528) Re: Pizza
Posted by amthevessel on 9 Aug 2021 at 3:11PM
What kind of Pizza does Steve McGarrett take ? - Hawaiian Five-OH.
(#5267469) Re: Pizza
Posted by PattyMac on 9 Aug 2021 at 11:35AM
What does an anteater like on its pizza?

Ant-chovies.
(#5267394) Re: Pizza
Posted by LittleTree on 9 Aug 2021 at 7:19AM
My Hawaiian pizza is burnt. They need to cook it at aloha temperature.
(#5267355) Re: Pizza
Posted by Big Giant Head on 9 Aug 2021 at 5:47AM
I want to work at a pixxa place.

I just want a pizza the action.
(#5267119) Re: Pizza
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 8 Aug 2021 at 11:11AM
What do you call a pretend pizza? A pepperphony pizza
(#5267109) Re: Pizza
Posted by Jools on 8 Aug 2021 at 10:08AM
What do you call someone who likes his pizza uncooked?
A weird-dough!
(#5267099) Re: Pizza
Posted by HeartOnFire on 8 Aug 2021 at 9:35AM
Why does eating pizza make you want to take a nap?
Because with all that pizza and mozzarella, you’re bound to catch some z’s!
(#5267061) Re: Pizza
Posted by rabbitoid on 8 Aug 2021 at 6:51AM
I think you have to divide the pizza into π's in order to fix it.
(#5267060) Re: Pizza
Posted by Lil Red on 8 Aug 2021 at 6:38AM
How do you fix a broken pizza?
Tomato paste.
(#5267045) Re: Pizza
Posted by marcmandy on 8 Aug 2021 at 5:41AM
I want a piece o' pizza!
(#5267044) Re: Pizza
Posted by eliphont551 on 8 Aug 2021 at 5:38AM
My local pizza place is struggling to stay afloat They really knead the dough
(#5266934) Pizza
Posted by monkeytyper on 7 Aug 2021 at 8:45PM
Hope you all like the new Pun Subject..Pizza
(#5266797) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 7 Aug 2021 at 1:09PM
Hi all the winner of this weeks contest is monkeytyper so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As normal you now get to choose the subject/ topic of the upcoming weeks contest. Many thanks to all that have entered or just voted & making the club a fun place to visit
(#5266796) Re: weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 7 Aug 2021 at 1:04PM
The UK just about now
(#5266756) Re: weekly contest
Posted by marcmandy on 7 Aug 2021 at 8:36AM

In what time zone?
(#5266690) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 7 Aug 2021 at 4:32AM
Hi all just a few hours left to vote in this weeks contest & as usual it is a pretty close contest. Could your vote make all the difference? voting closes at 9PM this evening
(#5265902) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 5 Aug 2021 at 3:55AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on a very healthy 7 puns to choose from this week so good luck to all that have entered. Voting closes 9PM Saturday evening. Any problems please message me
(#5265168) Re: this week's topic: SANDWICH MEAT
Posted by PattyMac on 2 Aug 2021 at 9:28PM
I look back and I think my decision to order a vegetarian sandwich was a missed steak.
(#5264804) Re: this week's topic: SANDWICH MEAT
Posted by monkeytyper on 2 Aug 2021 at 4:59AM
I've got a terrible addiction, I can't stop eating deli meats.

I'm trying to quit cold turkey.
(#5264528) Re: this week's topic: SANDWICH MEAT
Posted by LittleTree on 1 Aug 2021 at 2:22PM
What did the burger meat say to the BBQ? “Is it meat you’re looking for?
(#5264522) Re: this week's topic: SANDWICH MEAT
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 1 Aug 2021 at 2:01PM
If you loiter in a Tibetan spiritual leaders sandwich shop every day, then...
... you dilly dally in the Dalai's deli daily.







More of a joke but could not resist......I laughed.....life is to short not to laughSmiling
(#5264519) Re: this week's topic: SANDWICH MEAT
Posted by Jools on 1 Aug 2021 at 1:52PM
I was going to post a pun about sandwich meat, but it was a load of baloney
(#5264377) Re: this week's topic: SANDWICH MEAT
Posted by eliphont551 on 1 Aug 2021 at 5:23AM
Q. What is it called when you cut up a long deli sandwich into several pieces?
A. A sub-division.
(#5264283) this week's topic: SANDWICH MEAT
Posted by bestgremlin on 31 Jul 2021 at 8:43PM
What do sandwich meat and European royal families have in common? They are both in bread.
(#5264190) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 31 Jul 2021 at 1:39PM
Hi all the winner of this weeks contest is bestgremlin so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the title/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many thanks to everyone who took part this week be it entering a pun or simply just voting it makes the board a fun place to visit take care all & have a good week
(#5264028) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 31 Jul 2021 at 2:38AM
Hi all just a few hours left on the voting for this weeks contest & as usual it is very close could your vote make all the difference? Closes at 9PM this evening
(#5263411) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 29 Jul 2021 at 5:41AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on 6 puns to choose from this week so good luck to all that have entered the poll finishes 9PM Saturday evening Please any problems spotted message me asap. Take care all
(#5263381) Re: weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 29 Jul 2021 at 3:24AM
Thank you very much
(#5262428) Re: this week's topic: SEAFOOD
Posted by Jools on 26 Jul 2021 at 10:54AM
I have not thought of a seafood pun yet. Seems like I need some time to mullet over?

(and all these puns are krilling me)
(#5262354) Re: this week's topic: SEAFOOD
Posted by PattyMac on 26 Jul 2021 at 5:54AM
Oh my cod, I laugh so hard when someone cracks a seafood joke
(#5262227) Re: this week's topic: SEAFOOD
Posted by LittleTree on 25 Jul 2021 at 8:16PM

I never should have eaten seafood at that fishy place. I feel eel!
(#5262224) Re: this week's topic: SEAFOOD
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 25 Jul 2021 at 8:02PM
Did you hear about the fight at the seafood restaurant last night?
Battered Fish Everywhere!
(#5261997) Re: this week's topic: SEAFOOD
Posted by eliphont551 on 25 Jul 2021 at 5:30AM
I never understood the "seafood" diet joke.
It just seems like they were fishing for laughs.
(#5261991) Re: weekly contest
Posted by eliphont551 on 25 Jul 2021 at 5:15AM
Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.

Not a problem shillotte. We are all human. Smiling You do an excellent job on this board! High five
(#5261987) this week's topic: SEAFOOD
Posted by bestgremlin on 25 Jul 2021 at 5:01AM

Lobsters, clams, and oysters look nice but they don't do much to help others. They are pretty shellfish.

-- bestgremlin
(#5261851) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 24 Jul 2021 at 11:13PM
Hi all once again we have tied winners in this weeks contest so congratulations to PattyMac & bestgremlin & a token is on its way to you both & I choose bestgremlin to pick the topic/subject for the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all who entered or just voted it wouldn't be a fun contest without you
(#5261572) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 24 Jul 2021 at 2:36AM
Hi all thank you so much for all the kind messages I would just like to ask if you see an error please message me so I can put it right Thank You. I would also like to personally say sorry to eliphont551 for missing your pun. Back to the contest it is very close once more could your vote make all the difference? Voting closes at 9PM
(#5261468) Re: we need you
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 23 Jul 2021 at 7:55PM
I also love this board and try to post something everyweekSmiling
(#5261437) Re: we need you
Posted by PattyMac on 23 Jul 2021 at 6:09PM
I love this board and you are doing a great job as I knew you would Hugging
(#5261277) Re: we need you
Posted by rabbitoid on 23 Jul 2021 at 8:32AM
Definitely! one of my favourite boards. And you made i so. Before you took control there were only very few posts.
(#5261272) Re: we need you
Posted by LittleTree on 23 Jul 2021 at 8:04AM
...and also, ALL of us make mistakes on our boards. I do quite a lot. Dizzy It makes us only human and I think players realize that; the majority, anyway. You do a great job and make it a fun place to go!!
(#5261131) Re: we need you
Posted by ozallan on 23 Jul 2021 at 1:12AM
Hi,

Thats OK shylot!

Allan
(#5261130) Re: we need you
Posted by shillotte on 23 Jul 2021 at 1:10AM
And apologise for spelling your name wrong Allan realised after Smiling
(#5261129) Re: we need you
Posted by shillotte on 23 Jul 2021 at 1:06AM
Thanks Alan for your kind words much appreciated
(#5261127) we need you
Posted by ozallan on 23 Jul 2021 at 12:50AM
Hi Shillotte,

One small oversight is nothing important. You do a great job and we all love it, (In addition my extensive mailing list in Oz love it because I weekly send them all of the puns).

Please continue your great work - we really do appreciate it.

Allan.
(#5261126) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 23 Jul 2021 at 12:44AM
I have missed one but I have also asked people to pm me if there is a problem asap as there have already been 9 votes there is nothing I can do now.... if I had been told straight away I could have closed & reopened the poll... I don't get a lot of time to do this & I am beginning to wonder if it is worth it. If anyone wants to take over from me they are welcome to do so
(#5260988) Re: weekly contest
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 22 Jul 2021 at 1:14PM
Opps you did forget one, but to me all were funny and punnySmiling
(#5260918) Re: weekly contest
Posted by Jools on 22 Jul 2021 at 8:44AM
I agree, the others are irrelephant by comparison
(#5260859) Re: weekly contest
Posted by rabbitoid on 22 Jul 2021 at 4:35AM
Protest! the best entry isn't listed: the one in eliphont551's post.
(#5260857) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 22 Jul 2021 at 4:31AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on 3 to choose from this week so it is going to be close. Any problems with entries please pm me asap. Good luck to all who have entered
(#5259927) Re: Thank you for the votes. Smiling
Posted by PattyMac on 19 Jul 2021 at 6:07PM
Why did the elephants get kicked out of the pool?
Their trunks kept falling down.
(#5259689) Re: Thank you for the votes. Smiling
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 18 Jul 2021 at 10:40PM
What did the elephant say to the naked man?
How do you breathe through that little thing?
(#5259669) Elephants
Posted by bestgremlin on 18 Jul 2021 at 7:32PM
A traveling elephant can't smell because his trunk is packed.
(#5259519) Thank you for the votes. Smiling
Posted by eliphont551 on 18 Jul 2021 at 5:28AM
Of course my topic pick is - elephants Smiling

Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant.
(#5259492) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 18 Jul 2021 at 2:47AM
Hi all a very close run contest this week sees 2 winners eliphont551 & PattyMac with 31% of the vote each so congratulations to you both & a token each is on its way. Many Thanks to all who took part & voted & making this a fun board to visit have a good week all
(#5259232) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 17 Jul 2021 at 4:45AM
Hi all just a few hours to go in this weeks contest & it is very close once more with 2 puns tied for 1st place will your vote make the difference? Voting ends at 9PM tonight
(#5258614) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 15 Jul 2021 at 7:12AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on 5 entries to choose from this week so good luck to all who have entered. Any problem with your entry please PM me asap. You have until 9PM Saturday evening to vote
(#5258562) Re: new pun: crab
Posted by bestgremlin on 15 Jul 2021 at 3:07AM

Worried that a crab will pinch you in a tight place? It's just a bit of claws-trophobia.

-- bestgremlin
(#5258025) Re: new pun: crab
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 13 Jul 2021 at 3:53PM
How can you tell a crab is drunk.........it walks straight
(#5258013) Re: new pun: crab
Posted by eliphont551 on 13 Jul 2021 at 2:48PM
How do crabs get around on land?
They use the sidewalk.
(#5257986) Re: new pun: crab
Posted by Lil Red on 13 Jul 2021 at 1:15PM
What do you call the greated crab artist that ever lived?
Leonard de Pinci
(#5257915) Re: new pun: crab
Posted by PattyMac on 13 Jul 2021 at 8:45AM
What does a hermit crab call its home?
Michelle.
(#5257860) new pun: crab
Posted by mystori on 13 Jul 2021 at 5:20AM
Thank you for the votes! Have fun Let's see those crab puns Crabby
(#5257450) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 12 Jul 2021 at 4:55AM
Hi all once again sorry for the delay internet problems again. The winner of this weeks contest is mystori so congratulations & a token is on its way. As usual you now get to pick the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. It was a very close contest this week with a great number of entries many thanks to all of you that entered
(#5256818) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 10 Jul 2021 at 4:00AM
Hi all extremely close this week with a 3 way tie currently will your vote make all the difference? Voting closes at 9PM this evening
(#5256172) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 8 Jul 2021 at 3:10AM
Hi all the poll is up on the board & ready to vote on A very healthy 8 puns to choose from so good luck to all that have entered. Voting closes on Saturday at 9 PM
(#5255845) Re: New Pun - will be sink
Posted by PattyMac on 7 Jul 2021 at 12:40PM
You can tell the gender of an ant by putting it on top of water. If it sinks, it's a girl ant. If it doesn't, buoyant.
(#5255635) Re: New Pun - will be sink
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 6 Jul 2021 at 7:21PM
My granddad tried to tell everyone that would listen that the Titanic would sink...
They finally kicked him out of the theater
(#5255615) Re: New Pun - will be sink
Posted by volvath on 6 Jul 2021 at 5:49PM
It sinks and rose as the tides come and go
Then gave and almighty wave to be rescued
From the aftermath
volvath
(#5255612) Re: New Pun - will be sink
Posted by ozallan on 6 Jul 2021 at 5:40PM
What do the French call a kitchen appliance with 5 taps? A cinq!
(#5255601) Re: New Pun - will be sink
Posted by mystori on 6 Jul 2021 at 4:34PM
I had to fix a leak in the sink today. I found it very draining and decided I'm all washed up as a plumber.
(#5254785) Re: New Pun - will be sink
Posted by bestgremlin on 4 Jul 2021 at 8:25AM
Our Dutch au pair dropped her wooden shoe in with dishes. It clogged the sink.
(#5254775) Re: New Pun - will be sink
Posted by eliphont551 on 4 Jul 2021 at 7:53AM
Mafia informants are like good eggs.
They sink right to the bottom.
(#5254756) Re: New Pun - will be sink
Posted by LittleTree on 4 Jul 2021 at 7:26AM
What's a kitchen sink that treats you right?

That's a Farrah Fawcett
(#5254754) New Pun - will be sink
Posted by PattyMac on 4 Jul 2021 at 7:23AM
Im at the dining room table on lap top, looking into the kitchen with a sink full of dishes...ugh...hence the pun. Smiling
Maybe I should sit on other side of table instead...LOL
(#5254677) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 4 Jul 2021 at 2:35AM
Hi all the winner of this weeks contest is PattyMac so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all who have taken part
(#5254363) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 3 Jul 2021 at 7:02AM
Hi all just a few hours to go in this weeks contest & as usual very close could your vote make all the difference? Closes at 9PM tonight
(#5253922) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 2 Jul 2021 at 3:45AM
Hi all the poll is up on the board & ready to vote on just the 3 entries to choose from this week. Apologies it is a day late forgot all about it yesterday. Good luck to those who entered & please PM me asap if there are any problems
(#5252597) Re: Lets go with Bowling
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 28 Jun 2021 at 2:39PM
I wanted to go bowling but the pins were on strike
(#5252472) Re: Lets go with Bowling
Posted by PattyMac on 28 Jun 2021 at 6:24AM
I was going to tell you a really bad bowling pun but I thought I’d spare you.
(#5252471) Re: Lets go with Bowling
Posted by monkeytyper on 28 Jun 2021 at 6:20AM
When I go bowling, the ball always ends up in the gutter.
That’s just how I roll.
(#5252454) Lets go with Bowling
Posted by PattyMac on 28 Jun 2021 at 5:41AM
Was just at a bowling tournament this past weekend. Thanks for the Win, love this board...Thumbs up
(#5251972) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 27 Jun 2021 at 1:57AM
Hi all the winner of this weeks contest is PattyMac so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all that have taken part & made it a fun place to visit
(#5251590) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 26 Jun 2021 at 4:39AM
Hi all just a few hours to go in the voting on this weeks contest & it is very close once again could your vote make all the difference? Closes at 9PM this evening
(#5250670) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 24 Jun 2021 at 6:01AM
Hi all the poll is now active & ready to vote on 6 entries to choose from this week & good luck to all who have entered. Any problems with your entry please pm me asap have fun!
(#5250600) Re: New Topic - Giraffes
Posted by Evan54 on 23 Jun 2021 at 11:55PM
This giraffe had the neck to tap the zoo-keeper's phone-line.
(#5249977) Re: New Topic - Giraffes
Posted by PattyMac on 22 Jun 2021 at 10:11AM
"You bet giraffe," going to enter this contest too....lol
(#5249667) Re: New Topic - Giraffes
Posted by Lil Red on 21 Jun 2021 at 1:22PM
Today I Learned that a giraffe's neck is so strong a human can climb up it. Also, I got banned from my loco zoo.
(#5249665) Re: New Topic - Giraffes
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 21 Jun 2021 at 1:19PM
The zoo with only giraffes are called Giraffic Park
(#5249657) Re: New Topic - Giraffes
Posted by Jools on 21 Jun 2021 at 12:16PM
What do you get if cross a terrapin with a giraffe and a kangaroo?

A turtle-neck jumper.
(#5249607) Re: New Topic - Giraffes
Posted by bestgremlin on 21 Jun 2021 at 7:56AM
The zookeeper was late feeling the pandas because he got caught in a giraffic jam.
(#5249580) New Topic - Giraffes
Posted by LittleTree on 21 Jun 2021 at 6:15AM
(#5249487) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 21 Jun 2021 at 1:10AM
Hi all the winner of this weeks tournament is LittleTree so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest Many Thanks to all who took part
(#5248924) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 19 Jun 2021 at 5:55AM
Hi all in what is a very close contest this week there are only a few hours left to vote will your vote make all the difference? Closes at 9PM this evening
(#5248149) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 17 Jun 2021 at 3:56AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on & 6 entries to choose from this week. Good luck to all who have entered if there is any problem with your entry please pm me asap
(#5246814) Re: New Topic for Puns - Coffee
Posted by PattyMac on 13 Jun 2021 at 8:01PM
What’s the best Beatles’ song to play at a coffee shop? Latte Be!
(#5246724) Re: New Topic for Puns - Coffee
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 13 Jun 2021 at 3:41PM
How does Moses make coffee? He-brews it
(#5246576) Re: New Topic for Puns - Coffee
Posted by Jools on 13 Jun 2021 at 9:59AM
Words cannot espresso how much a good coffee beans to me
(#5246556) Re: New Topic for Puns - Coffee
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 13 Jun 2021 at 6:49AM
I was reading a book about the origin of cappuccino but it was all froth and no substance.
(#5246555) Re: New Topic for Puns - Coffee
Posted by eliphont551 on 13 Jun 2021 at 6:43AM
The daily grind
(#5246552) New Topic for Puns - Coffee
Posted by LittleTree on 13 Jun 2021 at 6:33AM
A bad cup of coffee can be considered grounds for divorce.
(#5246455) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 13 Jun 2021 at 1:38AM
Hi all the winner of this weeks contest is LittleTree so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get the chance to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Many thanks to all who have taken part have a good week
(#5246201) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 12 Jun 2021 at 3:04AM
Hi all just a few hours to go in the voting in this weeks contest as usual it is pretty close could your vote make all the difference? voting closes 9PM this evening
(#5245440) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 10 Jun 2021 at 4:45AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on 5 entries to choose from & good luck to all who have entered. Any problems please pm me asap. Voting closes Saturday at 9PM
(#5244522) Re: Contests Topic
Posted by Jools on 7 Jun 2021 at 12:13PM
I've invented a new talent contest where you have to dress up as a sailor and eat spinach as fast as possible....

I'll call it Popeyedol.
(#5244511) Re: Contests Topic
Posted by amthevessel on 7 Jun 2021 at 11:32AM
A song for Europe
to give you hope!
In 1996 of course.
My Lovely Horse
The very best
in the Euroboring song contest.
(#5244510) Re: Contests Topic
Posted by PattyMac on 7 Jun 2021 at 11:14AM
I entered 10 puns in a joke contest. I figured one of them would win...

But no pun in ten did.
(#5244498) Re: Contests Topic
Posted by bestgremlin on 7 Jun 2021 at 9:55AM
Frank, the hot dog, opened the contest envelope
he received in the mail. It read:
"You may already be a weiner...." Hotdog
(#5244477) Re: Contests Topic
Posted by LittleTree on 7 Jun 2021 at 8:46AM
Sorry, guys, the topic is "contests"
(#5244431) Re: Contests Topic
Posted by PattyMac on 7 Jun 2021 at 7:05AM
A cement mixer and a prison bus crashed on the highway...

Police advise citizens to be on the lookout for a group of hardened criminals!
(#5244411) Re: Contests Topic
Posted by amthevessel on 7 Jun 2021 at 6:27AM
Open the door, Richard!
Open the door and let me in.
(#5244409) Re: Contests Topic
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 7 Jun 2021 at 6:19AM
.
Is the topic prison or poetry?
(#5244407) Contests Topic
Posted by LittleTree on 7 Jun 2021 at 6:01AM
They started a poetry contest at my local prison But I don't know how I feel about that.

There are prose and cons!
(#5244376) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 7 Jun 2021 at 3:32AM
Hi all once again sorry for the delay still experiencing internet problems. The winner of this weeks contest is LittleTree so congratulations & a token is on it's way to you. As usual you now get to choose the upcoming weeks contest. Many Thanks to all who took part or simply just voted. Take care all & have a good week
(#5243640) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 5 Jun 2021 at 4:17AM
Hi all in what is a very close contest this week there is only a few hours left to vote. Could your vote make all the difference? closes at 9PM this evening
(#5243034) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 3 Jun 2021 at 4:23AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on. 5 to choose from this week so good luck to all who entered. If there are any problems with any of the entries please pm me. Take care all
(#5242170) Re: New topic, llamas
Posted by LittleTree on 1 Jun 2021 at 8:49AM
The llama couldn’t believe that the mirror showed his spitting image!
(#5242037) Re: New topic, llamas
Posted by PattyMac on 31 May 2021 at 8:32PM
Llama mia, here I go again entering the pun contest!
(#5241945) Re: New topic, llamas
Posted by Jools on 31 May 2021 at 2:30PM
Q. What is a Llamas Favourite Drink?
A. Llamanade!

(yes I know it's terrible - alpaca my bags) Smiling
(#5241920) Re: New topic, llamas
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 31 May 2021 at 1:43PM
What do you get if you stand between two llamas? Llamanated
(#5241913) New topic, llamas
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 31 May 2021 at 1:25PM
What do llamas say when they’re being told something obvious? “No spit, Sherlock.”
(#5241912) Re: weekly contest
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 31 May 2021 at 1:24PM
THANK YOU
(#5241849) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 31 May 2021 at 7:52AM
Hi all sorry for any delay I lost my internet connection on Saturday. This weeks winner is RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. As usual you now get to choose the subject/topic of the upcoming weeks contest. Guys as a sidenote if there is a problem & I have missed your entry or not copied it properly please pm me Thank You
(#5241186) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 29 May 2021 at 5:39AM
Just a few hours to go in this weeks contest & another close run one. could your vote make all the difference? voting closes at 9PM tonight
(#5241184) Re: weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 29 May 2021 at 5:36AM
I am sorry I must have made a mistake when I copied & pasted it these things happen... I like everyone else am not perfect if this happens you could always private message me when the poll went up & I could have restarted the poll but too late now as I have just seen it
(#5240522) Re: weekly contest
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 27 May 2021 at 6:26AM
The second one on the poll is not correct. And the way it reads on the poll does not make any sense and could affect the voting in a negative way for that entry.

It should read....

What’s weirder than seeing a cat fish? Seeing a goldfish bowl.
(#5240507) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 27 May 2021 at 4:54AM
Hi all the poll is up on the board & ready to vote on for this weeks contest. We have 6 entries to choose from this week so good luck & many thanks to all who have entered. Take care all
(#5239923) Re: New topic, Fish or Fishing
Posted by Jools on 25 May 2021 at 11:54AM
Oh for cod's hake, not another fish pun, or do you need some time to mullet over?
(#5239191) Re: New topic, Fish or Fishing
Posted by bestgremlin on 23 May 2021 at 7:33AM
The fish he tried to land was so big and fighting so much that, just when he got it landed on the pier, it crashed into the pier's scales, knocking them and the fish itself into the water.

He still talks about the one that got a weigh.
(#5239048) Re: New topic, Fish or Fishing
Posted by LittleTree on 22 May 2021 at 8:01PM
You can tune a guitar but you can't tuna fish...
Unless of course you play bass.
(#5239044) Re: New topic, Fish or Fishing
Posted by volvath on 22 May 2021 at 7:58PM
The trout jump the rainbow bridge when it went diveing
volvath
(#5239037) Re: New topic, Fish or Fishing
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 22 May 2021 at 7:25PM
What’s weirder than seeing a cat fish?
Seeing a goldfish bowl.
(#5239035) Re: New topic, Fish or Fishing
Posted by PattyMac on 22 May 2021 at 7:12PM
My dad was a fisherman, but he quit because his net income wasn't enough
(#5239025) New topic, Fish or Fishing
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 22 May 2021 at 6:35PM
(#5239023) Re: weekly contest
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 22 May 2021 at 6:34PM
THANK YOU
(#5238993) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 22 May 2021 at 4:56PM
Hi all in a very close contest this week the winner is RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack so congratulations & a token is on its way to you. You now get to choose the topic/subject for the upcoming weeks contest Many Thanks to all who have taken part
(#5238854) Re: weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 22 May 2021 at 5:15AM
evening lol
(#5238853) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 22 May 2021 at 5:14AM
Hi all just a few hours to go in this weeks voting & it is a very close contest this week could your vote make all the difference? closes 9PM this vening
(#5238026) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 20 May 2021 at 5:03AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote 6 puns to choose from this week voting ends Saturday 9PM. Good luck & thanks to all who have entered take care all
(#5236641) Re: For next weeks subject is skip or skipping
Posted by Silkwood on 16 May 2021 at 11:21AM
Boyfriend asks if I know why Windows is skipping Windows 9 and coming out with Windows 10 instead...

"Because Windows 7 8 9!
(#5236638) Re: For next weeks subject is skip or skipping
Posted by Jools on 16 May 2021 at 11:04AM
Skipping Dinner is A Big Missed Steak
(#5236621) Re: For next weeks subject - skip or skipping
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 16 May 2021 at 10:26AM
My 5 yr old son was just imprisoned for skipping naptime
He was resisting a rest
(#5236620) Re: For next weeks subject is skip or skipping
Posted by LittleTree on 16 May 2021 at 10:18AM
I used to think skipping to the ends of stories would save time...
...but then I learned to stop jumping to conclusions.
(#5236617) Re: For next weeks subject is skip or skipping
Posted by PattyMac on 16 May 2021 at 9:50AM
What do you call Batman skipping church?

Christian Bale
(#5236612) Re: For next weeks subject is skip or skipping
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 16 May 2021 at 9:39AM
Doctor!! I told you, I’ve got fatigue and my heart keeps skipping a beat. Why do you keep calling me a liar!?
Doctor: Sir I’ll say it again, that’s A- Fib.
(#5236611) For next weeks subject is skip or skipping
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 16 May 2021 at 9:38AM
(#5236542) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 16 May 2021 at 2:46AM
Hi all the winner of this weeks contest is **Lover of Darkness** so congratulations & a token is on its way to you & as usual you now get the chance to pick the subject/topic of the upcoming weeks contest. Although there were only 3 entries this week I thought the standard of all 3 was very high so keep it up folks. Take care all & have a good week
(#5235318) Re: weekly contest
Posted by rabbitoid on 13 May 2021 at 7:15AM
Voted, but all three are good.
(#5235258) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 13 May 2021 at 3:53AM
Hi all the poll is up on the board & ready to vote on just the 3 entries this week so good luck to all who have entered & voting as usual ends 9PM Saturday evening
(#5234494) Re: this weeks subject is sons & daughters
Posted by LittleTree on 11 May 2021 at 5:52AM
I wondered why my daughter was throwing all my Stephen King books around the room. And then…

…IT hit me.
(#5234472) Re: this weeks subject is sons & daughters
Posted by Jools on 11 May 2021 at 4:05AM
My 4-year-old son has been learning Spanish all year and he still can't say the word, please.

which I think is poor for-four.
(#5234118) Re: this weeks subject is sons & daughters
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 10 May 2021 at 12:15AM
I told my daughter and son, "Go to bed, the cows are sleeping in the field." They said, "What's that got to do with anything?"
I said "That means it's pasture bedtime."
(#5233692) Re: This week's topic: RETIREMENT
Posted by volvath on 8 May 2021 at 1:53PM
There is no retirement from goldtoken this place is just pure fun
(#5233676) this weeks subject is sons & daughters
Posted by shillotte on 8 May 2021 at 1:18PM
as above the upcoming weeks subject is sons & daughters
(#5233675) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 8 May 2021 at 1:16PM
Hi all in a very close contest this week we have tied winners in bestgremlin & monkeytyper so congrats to you both & a token is on its way to you both. As it is a tie I will choose the upcoming weeks topic/subject & it will be sons & daughters thanks to all have taken part
(#5233663) Re: This week's topic: RETIREMENT
Posted by PattyMac on 8 May 2021 at 12:53PM
I was a banker but I retired because I lost interest
(#5233662) Re: This week's topic: RETIREMENT
Posted by LittleTree on 8 May 2021 at 12:50PM
I lost most of my retirement to that guy from Happy Days.

It was a real Fonzi scheme.
(#5233650) Re: This week's topic: RETIREMENT
Posted by Silkwood on 8 May 2021 at 12:23PM
I can’t wait to retire so I can get up at 6 o’clock in the morning and go drive around really slow and make everybody late for work.”
(#5233584) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 8 May 2021 at 8:39AM
Hi all just a few hours to go in this weeks voting & it is extremely close... could your vote make all the difference? Voting closes at 9PM this evening
(#5233074) Re: weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 7 May 2021 at 2:46AM
I thought the same thing
(#5232723) Re: weekly contest
Posted by rabbitoid on 6 May 2021 at 9:20AM
Hard choice between the exterminator and the seasoned veteran
(#5232716) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 6 May 2021 at 8:43AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote on so good luck to all that entered 5 to choose from this week Take care all
(#5231452) Re: This week's topic: RETIREMENT
Posted by amthevessel on 2 May 2021 at 4:53PM
How I want to be in that number... Take it Satch!
(#5231372) Re: This week's topic: RETIREMENT
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 2 May 2021 at 12:17PM
When you retire, you switch bosses – from the one who hired you to the one who married you.
(#5231235) Re: This week's topic: RETIREMENT
Posted by monkeytyper on 2 May 2021 at 5:31AM
What would the terminator be called after his retirement?

The Exterminator..
(#5231201) Re: This week's topic: RETIREMENT
Posted by Jools on 2 May 2021 at 3:23AM
A soldier who survived a pepper spray and mustard gas attack and partook in many assaults, now that he is retired people call him a seasoned veteran.
(#5230970) This week's topic: RETIREMENT
Posted by bestgremlin on 1 May 2021 at 1:47PM
When he finally retired, the circus had trouble replacing the Human Cannon Ball. They couldn't find anyone else of his caliber.
(#5230966) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 1 May 2021 at 1:25PM
Hi the winner of this weeks contest is bestgremlin so congratulations & a token is on it's way. As usual you now get to choose the topic/subject of the upcoming weeks contest. Thanks to everyone who have taken part or simply just voted the board wouldn't work without you all. Take care everyone
(#5230823) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 1 May 2021 at 5:56AM
Just a few hours to go in the voting for this weeks contest could your vote make all the difference? Voting closes at 9PM this evening
(#5230349) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 30 Apr 2021 at 12:06AM
Hi all sorry it's a day late I was unwell yesterday... The poll is up on the board & ready to vote on just the 3 entries this week which means it will be close Take Care all
(#5228426) Re: This week's topic: Offering flower FLOWER POWER Peace
Posted by monkeytyper on 25 Apr 2021 at 7:46AM
What did the flower write in his Mother’s Day card?

I’m proud to be orchid.
(#5228388) Re: This week's topic: Offering flower FLOWER POWER Peace
Posted by RabidWolff of the Wolf Pack on 25 Apr 2021 at 6:28AM
.
I killed a hundred weeds today! No, you only killed 98 weeds. Geez, sorry, I Roundup.
(#5228385) This week's topic: Offering flower FLOWER POWER Peace
Posted by bestgremlin on 25 Apr 2021 at 6:25AM
What do you get if you cross a Flower Child Offering flower with a Hell's Angel BIKER motorcylist?

Petal to the Metal.
(#5228357) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 25 Apr 2021 at 3:35AM
Hi all congratulations to bestgremlin for winning this weeks contest a token is on its way to you. As normal you now get the chance to pick the subject/topic for the upcoming weeks contest, Many Thanks to all who have entered this week & a special mention to Silkwood I am really sorry for missing your entry this week. Take care all
(#5228011) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 24 Apr 2021 at 4:04AM
Hi all last only a few hours to vote in this weeks contest could your vote make all the difference?
(#5228008) Re: weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 24 Apr 2021 at 4:01AM
Hi I am really sorry that is the first time that has happened I must have just had a senior moment please accept my apologies
(#5227183) Re: weekly contest
Posted by Silkwood on 22 Apr 2021 at 6:50AM
you left mine out
(#5227158) weekly contest
Posted by shillotte on 22 Apr 2021 at 4:52AM
Hi all the poll is on the board & ready to vote upon 6 entries this week to choose from good luck to all that entered take care all
(#5226520) Re: Weekly Contest
Posted by **Lover of Darkness** on 20 Apr 2021 at 3:24PM
Wanna hear a bird pun? ..no?
Well this is hawkward.

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